So your Aunt Trudy got you a nice candle for the holidays but you just happen to really hate the coconut smell. 🥥 How could she have known you had that regrettable experience at the beach a few years ago? 😳
The question is whether it’s socially acceptable to give that candle that you are never going to use as a gift to someone else.
That practice is known as regifting.
Check out the definition, according to Merriam Webster. ⬇️
Regift (intransitive verb): to give someone a gift that was previously received from someone else
Merriam Webster also reported that the word was first used in the intransitive sense in 1995.
Business Insider pointed us to a 1995 “Seinfeld” episode, which likely popularized the word.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VGbY6sirHM
The episode also highlights what could go wrong with regifting. Essentially, the original gift-giver finds out you secretly regifted and gets offended.
And that brings us back to the question about what’s socially acceptable.
What nuances are there that surround the practice?
❓Is it OK if the original person won’t find out and get their feelings hurt?
❓Is regifting essentially “recycling” something you won’t use?
❓Is it OK if you are honest about it?
❓Is it only acceptable if it’s something the other person could genuinely enjoy?
Everyone from Dave Ramsey to CNNMoney has taken on this question but we went to our favorite source — our readers — for insight.
In our informal Instagram poll, 84 percent of people said “Sure, why not?” when asked about whether it’s OK to regift. The rest of the group said it was tacky. 🤢
We asked for more in-depth responses, and here’s what we got.
“Yes. [It’s OK.] I put a gift from last year with my Christmas decorations with the purpose of regifting it this year.” — @treston_tanner
“Yes. [It’s OK,] if you truly believe the person would enjoy it.” — @45rlr
“Always tacky...any gift without a gift receipt, unless cash or a gift card, is tacky. If you’ve been given something you can’t or don’t want to us[e], pass it along but not as if you bought it for the person.” — @annambaum
“I will never be offended to receive a re-gift if it’s something that I would use!” — @toots.mcghee
“It depends if the person could use it. If not, sell the gift and with the money buy a new gift for the other [person].” — @v3rtigofc
“3 Rs. reduce, reuse, recycle! Of course, it’s best if the recipient can use it.” —@mfmegjoly
“Depends on whether the original gifter will ever discover their gift has been passed on.”
“It depends! I’ve done it. [It depends on] who the gift came from or what the gift was. I’m most likely to regift kitchen stuff. And there are some people I will tell, “I’m re-gifting this to you!” And there are some I wouldn’t dare tell! I currently have 2 gifts that are in my attic - still in the original package, because while nice gifts, they’re not needed in any way shape or form. One is from Christmas 2 years ago, one was just a random gift. I would rather pass stuff along than let it sit... I’m just waiting for the right opportunity to come along…” — Elizabeth W.
Emily Post says …
The Emily Post Institute — named for the best-selling writer on etiquette — also took on the topic and outlined some good points, some of which a reader comment above alluded to.
Generally, you want to avoid hurting someone’s feelings with a present. Offending someone is sort of the opposite reaction you want when you’re gift-giving.
Each person is different in what they might find upsetting, so keep that in mind. Just because you think regifting is practical doesn’t mean everyone agrees.
It’s also about honesty. Sure, it might be a little white lie, but pretending you bought something you didn’t is dishonest and thus potentially rude.
Just some points to consider.
Check out the rest of the tips and points from the Emily Post Institute here.
